journal: yep

out my window: summer is here and it's going to be 95 degrees all week, except in my office, where it's about 45 degrees all week.  if i wouldn't spontaneously combust when i went outside in the afternoon, i would happily wear pants and a wool sweater to work in the summer.  it's rediculous.  (first world problems, i know...) 
what i'm wearing: pants!!!  with a ruffly blue "work" tank top and a little short sweater that serves no purpose other than to cover my shoulders and be somewhat of an "accessory" to the outfit.  lately i am noticing that i am not in any way stylish.  my "business casual" workwear is all 6+ years old, so i imagine it was somewhat stylish then but i think not so much now.  plus, any of my "new" clothes are hand-me-downs from my mom who has lost so much weight that she is not a size 6 (don't mind me and my bitterness) and so she is giving me all of her clothes that are too big.  she informed me yesterday that she has 3 more bags of clothes to bring up but that thankfully, she has spared me the christmas overalls and sweaters.  close call! 
the toddler: he is decidedly walking now and having a great time.  i often worried and harbored an excessive amount of guilt for most of his first year because i was rarely able to read him books and sing songs, etc; but i have been making a conscious effort to work on that especially since we spend so little time together during the week.  so i am beyond pleased to report that both at home and at day care he will often be found digging through the books in search of one in particular and will sit down by himself and flip through the pages.  he is also very affectionate.  when picked up and snuggled, he has started to take his little hand and pat me on the back while hugging.  and he will snuggle his face into his stuffed animals (to which i will speak for him and say "i love you turtle" etc. so that he understand that to be a gesture of love.)  so showing love is very familiar to him and it all makes my heart so happy that he understands and does it often.  when going it alone, it's so easy to second guess every single decision (as i'm sure it is with two parents present as well!) and it's especially difficult to feel that your parenting is adequate and represents the love and parenting of both a mother and a father - so to see these things in him really almost brings me to tears because even though it often feels like i'm just barely treading water, i know that i'm doing some things right because he recognizes these important things.  lest you think it's all sunshine and roses though - he still has a major issue with throwing food/dishes/cups on the floor and that makes me want to kill people.  but we'll get there.
in the kitchen: my poor grill bit the dust (incidentally, so has the tv) while charles was home and that makes me sad because i love grilling in the summer.  so anyway, i've made another trip to the farmer's market and loaded up on some great stuff!  best deal of the day: a bowl of sugar snap peas for $2 - and when i asked for one, the lady gave me THREE bowls still for the same $2.  i am extatic.  she said they freeze well so i cleaned and trimed them up last night and will be making this and am very excited about it.  although so far the only ingredient i have are the peas... :)  i also got 8 bell peppers for $2 and have chopped them up and put them in the freezer for stuffed-pepper soup down the line.  made spinekopeta saturday and will be having salad and maybe some sort of chicken fajita sitaution with a leftover red pepper this week.  i need to cook some more of my dried black beans.  caprese salad with farmers market tomatoes too - life is good.
crafting: michelle g came to visit me this weekend and we had a blast!  she taught me how to paint with oils and i'm pretty sure i'm hooked!  i've always wanted to know how to paint and there is a particular painting i wanted to make for charles' man cave so we set to work.  what a wonderful experience!  so my mom, who used to oil paint, is going to dig around for any of her old supplies and i will need to buy some more myself to finish the work we started this weekend.  also, in visiting a classroom last week for work i saw the coolest quilt ever!  it was a very hungry catapillar quilt and it reminded me of my desire to quilt.  someday...  i also want to sew some puppets for cameron.  cause you know, i have lots of time and everything... 
reading: the old harry potter standby.  it comforts me.
bringing me joy: waiting all week to spend 2 1/2 days with my funny little boy.  skyping with charles and laughing with him about silly things.  getting healthy and slowly losing weight; also setting difficult goals - i have comitted to have my neighbor administer an army-standard PT test to me on my bday: 17 push ups in 2 minutes, 45 sit ups in 2 minutes, 2 mile run in less than 19:45 to pass.  once that is done, i will begin to prepare for my first 5k at the end of september with my church.  i am excited.
thinking about: i hate being sick.  cameron has been sick and now i am sick; aint nobody got time for that! 
no pictures - i put up a couple of us at the city market on fb that were great.