well in reading over my last post, i realize i was a bit too confident too soon. charles is in texas training this week and i'm getting a very brief refresher in how much it sucks to be alone. well, i shouldnt say "alone". i have an absolutely amazing group of friends here who are already taking up the banners an doing their duties in supporting myself and the other wives in my position. it's a pretty great feeling to have this family up here who understand what it's like and know how to help. but considering that none of those friends read my blog (to my knowledge at least), i dont want to short change you guys back home who support me too. prayers are good and always welcome. but i can imagine that it's hard to relate to my life just as it's hard for me to relate to yours as you raise your kiddos. but i must say, yours is probably easier to figure out. so i'm sorry if you find yourself wanting to help me and not knowing how. i could type all day long about what it's like to be an army wife... really, i could. but i dont know if it would make any more sense when i was finished than it does now (although i like to think that my powers of written expression are fairly sufficient). suffice it to say that it's a complicated mix of emotions. at any given minute i am: fine, agonizing, stressed, happy, sad, completely content, at peace, miserable, etc. it is my goal to be stable. to "thrive" seems like an insult to the lack of husband, and to be miserable is an insult to his limited level of long distance support. and so i strive to be stable and walk the line between a 365 day pity party and just a party.
dont really think i had a purpose in ranting as such. mostly i guess i wanted to vent that i miss my husband and i am not at all looking forward to dealing with this emotion again for an extended period of time.
on a good note though, one of said awesome friends up here was emailing me today and she has agreed to help me in my quest to get in shape. she used to be a drill instructor so it should be pretty awesome. yea - imagine that! beautiful blond army chick with 3 kids who used to be a drill instructor. you just never know...
Monday, November 15, 2010
Friday, November 5, 2010
*insert creative blog title here*
*insert pictures of incredibly cute and intelligent children here*
and now a word from our sponsor: REALITY!
so i figured i ought to update my blog for people like the 2nd coolest Mary i know, who become disappointed when they check blogs and they have not been updated.
we are chin-deep in the deployment prep at the casa Buford. he's been working 15+ hr days for the last 3 weeks and i have no idea how he does it. we usually eat dinner in the same room, me at the table, he at the table in front of the laptop typing documents for the next day's training while he shoves cold food in his mouth. last night we packed his stuff, equipment, etc. which will be stored until it's time for him to leave. it's beginning to become more real. suprisingly, i'm ok with it. barring any truly miraculous occurence, we will not become pregnant before he goes. so this next year or so will be yet another "work on/take care of michelle" year. i plan to spend a lot of time at the gym or working on the house. and i will definitely be working to pay off lots of bills and avoiding the extensive retail therapy that i indulged in last time. it wasnt good.
he's been cutting back on his smoking - which is great. he plans to quit while he's there, which is also great - now i don't have to deal with angry husband time!
christmas. yea....
job is still good. i've gotten to do a lot of cross training in the last couple of weeks so that's been fun. i think i've done pretty well to make my mark in the organization and i look forward to sticking around for a while. it's really nice to enjoy my job, it's been a few years since that's happened.
my parents are doing very well. they've been super busy since grandma kelly passed away. they made pretty quick work cleaning out her house and then did a lot of cleaning and repainting. i hear it looks really nice. my uncle will be moving in with his family this weekend, so we're all really happy to see the house stay in the family. i am just amazed at how well mom is handling it. and dad has been so supportive. i'm sure christmas will be tough for all of us but we'll make it work. mom and dad have already made plans to visit with a lawyer and find out how to streamline the legal processes for cameron and i when they pass... which is an odd thought but much appreciated all the same.
on that note.
and now a word from our sponsor: REALITY!
so i figured i ought to update my blog for people like the 2nd coolest Mary i know, who become disappointed when they check blogs and they have not been updated.
we are chin-deep in the deployment prep at the casa Buford. he's been working 15+ hr days for the last 3 weeks and i have no idea how he does it. we usually eat dinner in the same room, me at the table, he at the table in front of the laptop typing documents for the next day's training while he shoves cold food in his mouth. last night we packed his stuff, equipment, etc. which will be stored until it's time for him to leave. it's beginning to become more real. suprisingly, i'm ok with it. barring any truly miraculous occurence, we will not become pregnant before he goes. so this next year or so will be yet another "work on/take care of michelle" year. i plan to spend a lot of time at the gym or working on the house. and i will definitely be working to pay off lots of bills and avoiding the extensive retail therapy that i indulged in last time. it wasnt good.
he's been cutting back on his smoking - which is great. he plans to quit while he's there, which is also great - now i don't have to deal with angry husband time!
christmas. yea....
job is still good. i've gotten to do a lot of cross training in the last couple of weeks so that's been fun. i think i've done pretty well to make my mark in the organization and i look forward to sticking around for a while. it's really nice to enjoy my job, it's been a few years since that's happened.
my parents are doing very well. they've been super busy since grandma kelly passed away. they made pretty quick work cleaning out her house and then did a lot of cleaning and repainting. i hear it looks really nice. my uncle will be moving in with his family this weekend, so we're all really happy to see the house stay in the family. i am just amazed at how well mom is handling it. and dad has been so supportive. i'm sure christmas will be tough for all of us but we'll make it work. mom and dad have already made plans to visit with a lawyer and find out how to streamline the legal processes for cameron and i when they pass... which is an odd thought but much appreciated all the same.
on that note.
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