hello again - November update

out the window -
it's cold and rainy here. Cameron was excited to get to use his "cumbrella" this morning. they're talking possible snow over the weekend, but only in the 40s for next week so I think we'll just get more cold rain. bring it on!
wearing -
trusty old kahkis and a black shirt with a cardigan. I'm glad not to be a vain person, because I'm pretty sure I look ridiculous with these pants on. I've already let the hem out as far as I can and they're still an inch or two too short. go me.
big boy -
Cameron's language has really taken off the last few weeks and he is quite the conversationalist. I still get a fair amount of sass from him, but not too bad. the bossy stuff is pretty intense though. how does one deal with a bossy kid? is that normal? thoughts welcome. it's like he has to be in control of the situation so he wants to make sure to tell everyone what to do. he's me. I know he's me. I'm definitely not blind to that fact. still wish he would tone it down a bit.
he's gotten really tall lately, which is fun. and he is super sweet. he is the kisser of my hand and random hugs. and he still runs screaming to me when I pick him up as though he hasn't seen me all week. every day. :) it's the best.
he is doing a lot better at school about playing with friends instead of by himself. he talks about his friends at home more too, which is good. and the running has improved quite a bit. some of the facebook suggestions were most helpful.
he went to the dentist for the 2nd time a couple weeks ago and did AMAZINGLY well! I was super worried about it after the last episode, but he totally rocked it. and so I took him out for breakfast afterwards, which was a lot of fun. I need to be better about mommy and Cameron dates, he was the best boy. and since he has his daddy's teeth, the dentist keeps talking about how he will need braces and his teeth are too close together, etc. so the flossing regiment has begun. much to my surprise, it's going really well. never in a million years would I have thought that I could get a 3 yr old to floss, but it totally happens. I got him the little floss pick things and he does the front then I get the back. every day I am amazed that he is going for it. it's hard to believe that he will be 4 in just a few months.
little boy -
Lukey is still the cutest boy in the universe. he got all 4 of his first set of molars in the last couple of weeks, and he's growing. so there have been a lot of cranky evenings and early bed times. we are in the era of fake sneezes again. so that's pretty entertaining. he LOVES light sabers and is fearless. even Cameron won't willingly head down the hall unless the light is on, but not Lucas. in all ways, he lives life at full speed, 100%. it's amazing and I love it! his main goal in life right now is to get ahold of a lightsaber or a sword and swing it around or chase his brother with it or just generally hold it up as high as he can and RUN.
he can say a few words: hush (when the dogs bark), shoes, hi. and he is starting to get into books.
in the kitchen -
other than a huge mess, not much. I made some lasagna last week and thank the lord, i'll be eating the last bit of it for lunch today. tonight we're going to dinner at a friend's house. I have stuff to make tuna and noodles, green chile chicken enchiladas, white bean chicken chili, ham and beans, and roast. Charles will be coming home Saturday evening, so I know roast will be Saturday. I might make the enchiladas Friday so that he can eat hose while he's home too. looking forward to a quiet thanksgiving with the 4 of us.
crafting -
ha!
reading -
still the outlander series. I'm on book 5 or 6 now and still enjoying it.
bringing me joy -
those silly boys. my amazing husband, and knowing that I will get to see him soon! finding ways to keep the spark alive when we're apart for so long.
thinking about -
a lot lately. I know 2 people close to me who are finding themselves in messy divorces. my marriage is in an awesome place right now and it makes me so sad to see people I care about suffering in theirs. I had occasion, through work, to read someone's divorce decree a few months back and it literally made me cry at work to see it all spelled out as relating to custody of the children. thankfully the two people I know do not have kids in the equation, but I'm sure it's certainly painful enough. so sad.
this terrorist stuff can bite me too. right along with the election propaganda. there is such a cycle of negativity and violence. I was thinking about it at Mass this weekend. I want to put on my rose-colored glasses and pray for peace. but that just feels like such a load of B.S. there is evil in the world, it is here for a reason - to bring out the good. I have a really hard time believing that the problems will go away without substantial violence and loss of life. the problem is too big. but the problem is not too big for God. so I will just keep praying that he holds my family and our friends close and gives us the strength to weather whatever comes. because it is coming, that's for sure.
new job. I've started applying for government jobs, quite reluctantly, because we're quickly approaching the time when we can no longer afford for me to stay where I am. I hate it. I applied for one job but did not get it. last night I applied for 2 more. they are jobs as an editor and I REALLY want it! REALLY!! not only is the pay double what I make now, but it would just be a really fun job and would actually allow me to use my degree. it closes on Friday, so hopefully something happens with one of those. I do not want to leave my job, but if I were to get one of the editing positions, I wouldn't feel so bad about leaving here. it wouldn't be leaving for "a job" it would be leaving for "the job". so we'll see. I already told my boss and the superintendent that I had started applying elsewhere. aaaand I cried when I told them. (I really like my job a lot.) *sigh*
picture -
with daddy being gone for so long, we send a lot of pictures. so much so that Cameron now will randomly ask to send a picture to daddy. here is the latest:

journal: september

so my office has moved and I'm now in the very front of the building, entirely too close to the main doors for my comfort, with my boss and boss' boss at my back. opportunities for blogging or checking blogs at work have been thin on the ground. but the stars have aligned and here I am today to check in.
out the window:
it's a nice day today, plenty sunny and maybe a little warm. but it's definitely been a mild summer and I'm glad that fall is on the way. it's my favorite season, hands down. I'm all about a good disguisitory wardrobe. and this will be the year that I can fit into some of my cuter clothes.
wearing:
jeans day today at work! heeeey! so jeans and a teal shirt from sams. in general, I do not spend money on my clothes. fortunately, my mom occasionally does. without mom I wouldn't have much. plus, she's been finding some super great and cheap fabric at the estate sales that they like to check out, and has made me a number of skirts and dresses. but yes, in the last several months I have bought myself 2 shirts from sams (and some underwear, if you must know). I won't spend more than $10 on clothes, especially for myself. so that works out well. my father in law sent me an old navy gift card for my bday and I plan to go later in the fall and buy some new work out pants, as one of my 2 pair have developed the dreaded thigh-chaffing hole. I figure if they don't have work out pants that will work, I might find a nice sweater or something then I only have to make 1 trip.
kids:
my lukey turns 1 tomorrow. I'm obviously biased, but I'm convinced that he's the cutest boy in the universe. he will definitely be my trouble maker though. his best smile is the one he gives when you tell him NO. he's recently discovered that he can feed the dogs from his high chair. so that's fun. it looks like a circle of alligators around his chair when he eats. he's learned about high fives, and his go to word is "uh oh!", typically preceded by the sound of his cup hitting the floor. he's only down to half a bottle before bed, and I imagine i'll put an end to that this weekend. *tear* it's sad, all of these "lasts". but am at peace with our decision to stop at 2 kids.
Cameron has been trying new things lately, he's quite the sassy mcsasserson. 3 is just an incredibly frustrating age I think. potty training is still a certifiable nightmare. I've bit the bullet and started buying pull ups because I got sick of having to throw away underwear because I couldn't handle washing a big slimy man poop out of them. he will sit on the potty for the most part when you make him, but he doesn't usually do anything but sing songs. he WILL NOT tell you when he has to go before it happens, and will rarely tell you that he has gone afterwards. he just plain doesn't care. I've tried sticker charts and incentives and setting timers and nakedness and every other thing I can think of and nothing works. I know he won't be 15 and still in diapers, but I just didn't expect it to take this long. so other than the potty training thing and the attitude, he's doing ok. his imagination is really taking off and that's so cool to see! he still loves to go on "adventures", and since the grocery store is the only place we really ever go, he really enjoys the grocery store and will get excited every time we drive by one. he's incredibly intuitive of peoples feelings, especially mine. he knows when I'm getting frustrated and will say "mama, are you nice?" when he knows full well that I'm pissed off and decidedly NOT nice. it's very humbling and has a way of calming me down. maybe it's that he is so aware of it and that opens up the line to communicate why I'm upset and how we can work together to both get ourselves straightened out. Charles gets frustrated when I lose my shit but I think he's starting to see that Cameron and I have a system that is working fairly well.
in the kitchen:
I made that cheeseburger soup this week, that was good. last night I did a pork roast, I've been buying those pre-packaged marinated roasts and they're pretty good. tonight we'll probably clean out some leftovers and tomorrow we're having a cookout for lucas' birthday. spaghetti at some point in the future.
crafting:
yea, no.
reading:
the outlander series!!!!!!!!! OMG! I'm on the 3rd book. there are 8 of them with a 9th on the way. seriously, all I want to do is read. as it is, I've gone through 2 1/2 big books in less than a month. and given how much time I actually have to read, I'd say that's pretty good. I've not watched the series yet, apparently it's just the first half of the 1st book. the first book was published in 91, and my grandma and mom have been reading them since. so the books I'm reading belonged to grandma Kelly and it makes me extra happy to be sharing that with her. I wish I could talk to her about them. well, I wish I could talk to her about anything.
bringing me joy:
kids, husband, marriage, eating healthy and not being so puffy, exercising. I'm kicking some pretty good ass at work lately too, so that's fulfilling. I have a lot of extra job duties now, more State level things, and I feel like I'm doing a pretty good job at it. work used to be my "down time", but definitely not anymore. it IS still at least my time to not have to touch someone else's bodily fluids, but definitely not as relaxing.
thinking about:
my health. I had a chest pain scare last week that eventually sent me to the ER. they're not sure what it was other than to know that it at least was NOT my heart. still scary. I know my cholesterol is bad, and I'm pre-diabetic. so I'm just really doing what I can to fix myself. next week I'm seeing the nutritionist for a "cholesterol class", whatever that is, and will have my numbers checked at the end of the month with the possibility of going on medication.
single parenting. again. this round will last about 3 months and will be zero fun. but at least now I'm not going to be on that crazy summer schedule, so overall, while it will be lonely and stressful and difficult and sad, I am confident that I will handle it much better than I did this summer because I wont be on 10 hr days and will have time to hit the gym a couple times a week. mostly, I'm in awe of my husband. he has missed so much of the boys at this age. I could not bear it as gracefully as he does. his strength is truly amazing.
pictures:
yea, I haven't taken many lately. and anything of quality goes on facebook. so there ya go.

Funned Out

Well so far, we've all survived the summer. There is exactly 1 week left until Charles is home and we are all beyond ready. the combination of a crazy schedule, new classroom, no daddy, etc has really been rough on Cameron the last couple of weeks. there have been a number of hunger strikes and lots and lots of dramatic fit-throwing. we're all just tired. we will have a nice weekend with him before he goes back to work and then it is not likely that we'll see much of him for a while due to the schedule he will have at work. it's gonna be ugly, but we'll make it. i'll sure get to see him more than I have the last 2 months, so i'll take it!
lucas started crawling on his 9 month birthday, and about 30 minutes after that (not even exaggerating) he pulled himself up to stand. he is quite the go-getter! he will work to be mobile in any possible method to the point that his muscles tremble from fatigue, and even then he doesn't stop trying if I don't set him down somewhere that he has to rest. he now has a top tooth to join his lonely two bottom teeth. he likes to clap and make all sorts of mouth noises. we're still working on waving.
other than the tough stuff, Cameron is ok. overall he is amazingly resilient given all the challenges the last couple of months. potty training is not going well. still. last weekend I tried a potty chart. he picked out his own stickers (elmo, princesses, and spider man) and for one brief, shining evening - he did amazingly well! he even actually managed to get some pee in the potty instead of just sitting on it. but Saturday morning the fun had worn off and he is maintaining his resistance since. I've talked to his teacher and our plan is to put him in underwear and really force it after Charles gets home in hopes that the comfort of having daddy back will help with the transition. poor kid. one shit storm after another it seems.
im doing ok. getting fatter and fatter over the summer. I'm going to really hit it hard when I go back to my normal schedule. Im going to force myself to run outside (major irrational fear of mine) and do some diet changes, i.e. - no more cheese, very limited sugar (no more bowl of cream of wheat with chocolate chips for breakfast - whaaaaat?) so hopefully that will get the ball rolling. I've been having a lot of trouble with my knees the last 3 weeks or so. according to WebMD, the source of all healthcare knowledge, it is an issue with my tendon. so that's pretty awesome. I am one with the naproxen and ice packs.
my parents were up a couple weeks ago for a wedding, which was pretty fun. dad was wearing a heart monitor for 2 weeks at that time. after some tests, they decided that he should have a heart cath, which was yesterday. he has 2 arteries blocked 50% and one was 80%, so they put a stint in that one. thankfully the dr was very proactive and schedules aligned to get dad in pretty quickly before anything more serious happened than his original "episode" over mother's day weekend. so a substantial lifestyle overhaul will be happening down south I do believe.
good times.

April update

before the craziness of the summer begins, I figured I would check in here. also, it's slow at work. thus the stars align.
Out the Window:
well I must say, the Big Storm was a bit underwhelming last night. we frantically cleared a place in the garage for Charles' car last night ahead of the storm, which was supposed to hit around 6. no lie, at 6 right on the dot there was a big gust of wind and a few drops of rain on the deck. I quickly shooed the dogs outside because I knew they'd never go out to pee if it was raining (damn daschunds)and by the time I got them down to the basement door the "rain" had stopped. other than some apparently quiet rain in the night, we had nothing else here! it's still plenty humid, but for now the sun is trying to shine and all is calm in NE Kansas.
What I'm Wearing:
the usual - kakhi pants that are entirely too big for me, teal tank top, grey cardigan. these pants. they're the size 18 post-baby pants and I was just telling Charles the other day that I greatly look forward to setting them on fire once my 14s fit again. in the mean time, I'm pretty sure I could catch pies in the front of these suckers. not that I'm complaining about the fact that they're too big, I'm quite happy about it, I just wish I didn't have to pull them up all the time or worry about them falling down while kid-wrangling. it's a special skill to rock both the "mom look" AND a "gangster sag" at the same time. first world problems, right?
The baby:
mr. lucas has no patience for baby stuff. he is pretty much sitting up on his own and has quite a lot of stamina for tummy time. he can scoot backwards but not yet forwards. my goodness this is moving quickly! he loves to be in the thick of things and laugh at his silly brother, especially when he's dancing and singing. his sweet little face is the source of all sunshine, especially the little baby chicklet smile with those two bottom teeth. and if you attack his fat little cheeks with kisses he squeals and then gets this big old man belly laugh happening and it is hilarious! he's sleeping through the night without any issues and eating his solids like a champ. the daycare ladies totally love him. they are really great at working with him on his tummy time and sitting up. I was leary about taking him to the CDC so young, but it really has been a great thing for him.
The little boy:
I don't know what the age cap is for "toddler", but I think Cameron is probably good to be a little boy now. he's quite the big shot. his main lady at the CDC has been off since the beginning of march, so the potty training came to a screeching halt, but she will hopefully be back next week and we will attack it with renewed force then. I'm also hearing good things about a "potty watch" that the kids wear and can be set at regular intervals to vibrate and let them know when it's time to potty. really, I think he totally knows how to do it and we just need to get forceful about it and quit allowing him to be lazy. I'm not looking forward to that. at all. hopefully lucas is a faster learn. this man poop in a diaper stuff is not cool. he's also quite the sassy pants. common phrases include: "don't talk to me like that mama!" (when I have not said a word to him), "don't touch me!" (not sure where that one came from), and "go to your room mama!" (to which I reply "I wish I could buddy!"). mostly these are all just funny, but can be quite embarrassing when my 3 yr old yells at me in public. not sure how to get around that. I swear, I do not yell these things at him. I am forceful with the "go to your room"s, but not in a yelling angry way, just in a direct and "I'm in charge" way. logically, I know that he is regurgitating it all back to me as he hears it, but it's still humiliating.
in the kitchen:
last night I made some awesome cheeseburger soup! I've seen a lot of recipes on pinterest for it but not made it myself. I didn't like the sound of the ones that I was looking up though, plus I didn't want to go buy a whole bunch of ingredients. so mine ended up being a pound of ground turkey, 3 peeled and diced potatoes, about 3 cups shredded cheddar, a packet of liptons onion/mushroom soup, 3 cups beef broth (the recipes all called for chicken - why!?!?!?), a small can of petite diced tomatoes, about half a cup of diced dill pickles, some pepper and dry mustard, and about 1//3 cup diced onion. I totally had 2 bowls and brought more for my lunch today. yes. just - yes.
Crafting:
well.... Cameron and I have done a lot of coloring lately, does that count? little michelle (his awesome godmama) sent him some paints and markers and HUGE sheets of construction paper for his birthday.
I have a friend having a baby in the next 3 or 4 weeks so I plan to pick up some towels and wascloths to sew together for hooded towels. And I'm still technically working on the hand-quilting for lucas' blanket. it's just not super easy to get time to safely sit around with a needle for more than 2 minutes.
Reading:
nothing now. although I now have 3 books, 2 from mom and dad's church and now another one from mine, that I'd like to read. I don't know where it came from, but I'm really enjoying this trend of parishes providing the members with reading materials to deepen their faith. the classes and prayer groups and all those regularly-scheduled opportunities are awesome, but just not always realistic for people to attend. but by providing something for everyone at no cost that allows them to develop on their own time - it's much easier! yay!
Bringing me Joy:
my boys. my silly silly boys. Cameron's latest thing in the car is that he notices when we go up and down hills and will call out the direction followed by "WEEEEEEEE!!!!!". oh how exited we are to ride roller coasters with this boy! he's also still doing a lot of singing. "sugar" by maroon 5 is a favorite. he's getting pretty good too!
also seeing Charles with the boys. he has so much stress, well, we both do, but his job makes him more miserable than I've ever seen him, and it is painful to watch and hear his voice when he's at work. but he is amazingly good at leaving it at the door once he is home with the kids. he and Cameron are really getting close and Cameron has entered the "daddy's little shadow" phase. and it was about this time with Cameron that Charles left for korea, so it's fun to see him get to experience it with lucas. although that's short lived..
Thinking about:
stressful summer coming up. charles will pretty much be gone from the end of this month till the end of june. then at the start of july Cameron is having surgery on a cyst in his neck, followed by a surgery for charles the following week. combine that with my summer work schedule starting after memorial day (4 - 10 hr days) and it's shaping up to be quite a doozy. I've been borrowing an increasing amount of worry the last couple of weeks and finally my body broke out in hives over the weekend. oh how easy it is to stress over things beyond your control...
finances.
remembering to focus on what's important: i.e. - having happy, healthy kids who love me for who I am, not what I can give them. quality time over quantity. more dancing and singing and coloring and snuggles and books. less worrying about body fat and having surplus. help more people. be the type of person I want my kids to be.
pictures:

little man on Easter - he is clearly obnoxiously excited about big boy sitting up stuff! :D

here he is a couple days ago, passed out in a carrot coma. yes, my 7 month old is wearing 12 month pjs.

big boy is all about stickers, naturally. so he discovered this sheet of free address labels that came to charles from somewhere and went to town yesterday afternoon. isn't he just the Bee's Knees? (oh yes I did!)

cool kids

things are relatively slow at work, so I figured I would kill a bit of time with some blogging about my super cool kids.
Big Boy:
Cameron is really into music, books, cooking and generally being silly. much to my amazement, he will be 3 next month! we're throwing him a super hero party, which should be fun. that's the only "play theme" that he's consistently into now, although he still enjoys a good bit of curious George. (and waffles - but I didn't think that would be a very fun birthday theme for someone severely limited on funds and time) my mother in law has generously offered to make the cake and we have invited a couple of friends and some of the ladies from daycare. he doesn't really have friends at school that he's into. he is clearly a leader in the room, but he couldn't care less about any of that social nonsense. he interacts appropriately, but he also enjoys being on his own and actively avoiding trouble and chaos. (unless it's his idea, and then he's leading the charge.) while I sometimes worry that he isn't social enough, I'm also proud of the fact that he doesn't need validation from anyone else. and in fairness to him, by the time I see him at the end of the day, he has been in the room with the same crazy kids for the whole day and is ready to have his space.
potty training is finally under way and seems to be going fairly well, but slowly. we seem to have gone through the variety of potty options at home and the little mini seat that fits on top of the regular toilet seems to be working. I think he was scared of falling in. he will now agree to sit on the toilet a few times a day, sometimes things come out and sometimes they don't, but it's a start! at home, he gets a chocolate chip each time he sits on the potty. this weekend he was roosting and jabbering on as usual when he would suddenly get really pensive and whisper in an incredibly creepy way "I'm gonna get a chocolate chip..." to no one in particular, then go back to jabbering. it was ... interesting...
language is also a source of entertainment lately. he has excellent manners, for the most part. and to further his accreditation as the bossiest kid in the universe, he has started correcting us if we ask him to do something without saying please. it caught me off guard, but it's also pretty b.a.! "how do you ask, mama?" pahahahahah!!! funny kid.. another zinger is when he is told that it is time to go to bed: "no thank you mama, maybe later." :D he's getting better at catching song lyrics, which is both good and bad. he started singing a song the other day that I didn't even realize he liked, but it was quite clearly the tune. this concerns Charles a bit more than me. I, for one, thing it's hilarious to hear him sing "all about that bass" and have tried to convince Charles that it's a good song about having a positive body image. he, on the other hand, has a hard time hearing his son say "shake it shake it, like you're supposed to do". the jury is still out. although he did learn the valuable lesson of previewing youtube music videos before showing them to Cameron when he expresses an interest in a song from the radio.
big brother stuff is pretty cool too. for the most part, he doesn't mind sharing. and he is great about covering up brother if he needs a blanket, or bringing diapers (needed or not). the kisses on brother's little head are the sweetest things ever, trying to pry open brother's eyes while he sleeps in his car seat - not so much. but we're learning. I am so excited to see them play and interact more as they get bigger!

Little Boy:
Lucas is pretty much adorable. those big brown eyes just suck you in! I didn't think it was possible, but he is even more chilled out and happy and snuggly than Cameron even was! and to think, I had been so terrified of having a second child because I was convinced that there was no way I could get so lucky as to have two easy super cool kids. so maybe they'll be terrible teenagers, but for now I will not borrow any more worry than already comes with the territory and will say that I am 10000% enjoying the contentment of my two little gifts.
his bottles were not sufficient any longer, so the weekend before last I had him try some cereal. I was reluctant to do so at only 5 months but felt that he really did need something extra. I was right! he had zero learning curve and is now scarfing it down 3x a day and with applesauce mixed in at home. once I can get to the store next week I will start more foods, but for now it's all going very well. he is definitely a healthy and growing boy! he's also starting to get better control of his hands, so toys are entering his world as explorative opportunities. and without a doubt, his big brother has sunshine glowing out of every orifice. if lucas is in the walker, his little eyes will follow Cameron around the room like a spot light! and any bit of attention from him, or anyone, will just light up his sweet little face.
he was sleeping through the night for a glorious couple of weeks until lately, when he has been too hungry for that nonsense. he will be up in the night starving to death only to realize that he's too tired to actually stay awake and finish a whole bottle. such is life. he also does a lot of scooting in the night. I have to lay him at one side of one end of the crib and will find him in the opposite corner by morning. it took me a couple of days to come up with that solution as opposed to be woken up by a freaking out kid who is stuck in the corner of his bed. go me.

so life is definitely good at my house! I have two of the coolest kids around. they both are so sweet and innocent and they live 100% out loud without any inhibitions. it's just beautiful to see. I still struggle, during those times when everything seems to be happening at once and there are too many demands on my time or attention, but that has leveled out a lot and for the most part I manage to really give the best of myself to my family these days. it's pretty cool. :)

watching a miracle unfold

so I've been bumping this post around in my head for a few weeks. I don't think anything I could throw together would do justice to the situation, but since I know my couple of readers are likethis with G.O.D., I thought I'd put it out there in whatever form it comes in hopes of continued prayers for continued miracles. so here goes:
when Charles was in cuba, the year before we got married, he surprised me (understatement) by going through RCIA and joining the church. so this guy, who had never belonged to a church in his life, was impressed by what he saw in my family and became catholic. pretty awesome stuff! well, after we got married, real life crept back in and his work schedule was ridiculous and unpredictable. he start out coming to mass with me when he wasn't working, but to be honest, the priest was TERRIBLE. we lived in a small town and the next closest small town happened to share the priest with our town. awesome. so I trudged through with fr. fire and brimstone, but Charles was pretty quickly disappointed with how his big conversion had turned out and fizzled. he did not join me at church (other than Christmas) until about a year ago, when I was pregnant with lucas and no longer able to contain Cameron and deal with myself. he was very reluctant, much bitching was done. often he would wake up 5 minutes before we left and was rather huffy throughout mass. but he was there.
a number of factors have played in to the recent events:
1. our priest at st. frances de sales is AWESOME! he is the most REAL priest I've ever had. that's a long story, but suffice it to say, he has his struggles and he is not shy about talking about them. 10000% relatable.
2. our good friends janet and terry. I was lucky enough to meet janet at my job a few years ago and we are very close. she and her husband are my parents' age and they are amazing. we go to mass together and they have been very encouraging, for all of us.
so yes, the miracles. things started occurring to me lately, and when I looked back it was hard to pinpoint when changes started happening - but check this out:
- "hey michelle, will you wake me up 30 minutes early so that I can shower and get dressed before church?"
- then: "what is up with you staying after and talking to everyone after mass!?" now: no lie, we were there a good 20 minutes after mass ended the other day because he was talking to the guy who sits behind us. him, not me. I was chasing Cameron all over the place because he's a turd. just a week or two after my long-winded explanation to Charles about what a "church family" really means, there he is - making it!
- a couple weeks ago we had some guys from Jerusalem selling incredibly beautiful carvings. so we were all visiting with the people who sit behind us again, and their son comes up and hands Cameron this little carved heart magnet thing with the holy family on it. ok, cool. I was wrestling kids again so I only half paid attention to him when he said something about 'he gave me money'. turns out CHARLES had given THIS KID $20 and told him to buy something for him and something for Cameron. whaaaaaaaat?
oh! oh!
- so one time, janet and terry weren't there and I don't feel up to the task of taking both kids up by myself unless I'm wearing the baby, which I wasn't. so I tried to hand lucas off to Charles so that I could take Cameron up to communion for his blessing (and he always tries to weasel a host out of father because he "wants one too"). Cameron started to throw a fit because he wanted to stay with Charles. so Charles stepped out of the row so that I could take my place in line with lucas, then he GETS IN LINE BEHIND ME. uh, what? I am pretty confident that he didn't take communion, but he went. point: he went.

I know we have a lot of people praying for us. I know it, because I see it and feel it every day. and trust me, I pray for those who pray for us right back. but if anyone, myself included, ever feels like their prayers are not being answered - just think of this miracle. it's a slow one, but there is no denying that it's happening. might not seem like much to you, but to know this man and his past, it is. it really is. :)